10 Things I Think About Running

10 Things I Think About The Fota Wildlife Park Cheetah Run 5k

1. Great Place for a Race

I think that Fota Wildlife Park is one of those places where when you go there when you unfortunately aren’t running a race you constantly think this would be a great place for a race, they should have a race here, it would be great. As usual I am a great judge of where a great place for a race would be and it is great.

2. Pointing

I think that there was some excellent car park pointing at the race. Eagle A.C were out in force doing excellent stewarding, the best pointing of the night came from Derek O’Keeffe. It was friendly but authoritative pointing, the best type of pointing, leaving the driver of the car both sure of the direction and happy with the direction.

3. Warm Up

I think that I knew I was in trouble when I started the warmup. I warmed up with Sheldon in my new Runner’s Diary T-Shirt which Rhona got me for my birthday and insisted that I wear, despite the excellent high-quality fabric and colour of the t-shirt I felt terrible as I had the misfortune of contracting a disease from Billy during the week. I didn’t think it was a particularly bad disease just one of the normal inevitable head colds that you get from a two-year-old that make planning races impossible and make you consider wearing a mask around the house.

4. Scurrilous Race Directing

I think that it is very bad that race directors are willing to go as far as offering free entries to my enemies like John Meade to ensure that I don’t finish in the prizes. I’m a very nice man and a benevolent social media influencer who doesn’t look for any free entries, yet John Meade was invited on a gratuitous basis to the race to beat me. I know this because John Meade told me. It was just as well that John Meade was otherwise engaged otherwise I would have been very motivated to win.

5. Actually a Cheetah Run

I think that the event is well named. On the start line there was a high-quality field with past champions like James Grufferty and Kieran McKeown in attendance, I’m unsure how many of them were invited in the anti me conspiracy but a podium looked unlikely. We took off down the hill in the opposite way to which I usually have to carry Billy back to the car past the Giraffes before plunging down the hill where a Cheetah actually ran alongside us very fast which was nice.

6. Coldplay

I think that after 400m I started to panic. I couldn’t breathe because of a combination of the tree pollen and Billy’s disease. I was running with Kieran McKeown about 50m off the back of the lead group of 6. Kieran being the excellent coach that he is, could hear my shocking breathing and told me not to panic so I didn’t. The Kieran McKeown coaching service must be the only service in the country where the coach instructs his athletes from the race. Aidan Noone was given in race instructions to hop on my back which he did which was great coaching.

7. Kangaroo Route

I think that it is difficult to look at the animals when you are running a 5k around a wildlife park. Aside from the Cheetah the only animals I saw were Kangaroos that were bouncing along beside us. Aside from the difficulty in looking at the animals the route itself is lovely, it probably isn’t the fastest 5k in the world, but it has everything. Tiny little climbs, big little climbs, gravel and smooth tarmac. The Vaporfly 3s were a bit slippy on the gravel road but lovely and bouncy on the smooth tarmac around the park. The potholes on the bumpy gravel road were filled in with very black tarmac which made them easy to spot.

8. The Other Barry

I think that all races end up in a similar pattern. I spent the last 3km of the race engaging in all too familiar activity attempting to catch a Barr’s singlet. This time it was worn by Barry Twohig instead of John Meade. I though that I was closing on Barry as we went down the hill past the Lions and in with a chance of 5th but Rhona said that at the end the gap was huge and that I must have been seeing things. It was an impressive performance by Barry, he will have to be added to the long list of people for beating.

9. Heavy Me

I think that I felt like Billy normally feels at the 4km marker. Anytime I have taken Billy to Fota he starts to give up just after the penguins and the back breaking carrying starts. Sometimes if you are lucky, you can get the train back from the penguins and save your back. Interestingly the walk and run back from the 4km mark feel very similar. I have suffered a lot in that last kilometer.

10. Kudos No Comments

I think that the last 500m of the route are particularly challenging. I was in no mans land, there was no one in front of me and I couldn’t hear anyone behind me. I struggled up the hill by the Cheetah back out onto the smooth flat tarmac where the Giraffes live and tried to sprint but I couldn’t because I had no air. I could see that the clock had ticked over the magical 16 minutes which results in no “well done” comments on Strava just kudos. I couldn’t breathe at all at this stage so I was happy to get across the line in 6th the and my usual first of the non-prize places. I’ll be back next year and the year after and probably every year if I’m let.